In an interview with Sean Hannity on Faux News the other day, Newt Gingrich repeatedly referred to himself in the third person. Statements in quotation marks are taken directly from the interview, with minor alterations for purposes of rhyme and rhythm.
“Gosh, now why would a Newt
Gingrich do that?”
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| Adapted from photo by unicornbooty.com |
He was talking ‘bout how he and Hillary
Came together one time to share
Their efforts in promoting a cause
That’d be a great boon to health care.
“The answer is simple”, said he.
“Put Gingrich and Hillary together
And huge would the press coverage be.”
Now Newt had his business clients
Who’d make lots of money if they
Could sell their wares to officials
that they’d meet with that very same day.
But Newt says this wasn’t lobbying,
Contradicting the media’s
minions.
“No, it's called being a citizen”, he said
“I’m allowed to have my opinions.”
“If Newt Gingrich believes that,
And the companies I work with just
Happen to believe that as well,
There’s nothing that’s wrong, I trust,
If I talk with some friends of mine
About the issues we’ve just discussed.”
“They’re responding to what
Newt Gingrich believes, and I
Don’t go out and say ‘Tell me
What you believe in’” and then try
To fit my views to their wishes,
My views are my own - nothing amiss is.
My views are my own - nothing amiss is.
To Newt, it appears, a thought that is his is
Pretty damn good for business.
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